Monday, September 17, 2012

All By Myself

Coffee for one.

This past weekend, Nathan was away - he went to New York for a bachelor's celebration that his best dudes' planned. It included an artsy film, an Amon Tobin concert, a trip to a cabin, an epic Jenga game, and a college friend's comedy show. It sounds like he had a great time (he's coming home this afternoon), and while I was a little jealous of his adventures, I was also really, really, really happy to have a weekend to myself. 

I don't know about you, but I like to be alone. Obviously, I also like to be around people - I thrive on friendships with excellent folks and I'm constantly seeking out communities - but there's something to be said for keeping yourself company. I like the space it affords, the permission it gives to be as boring or as quirky as you want. This is not to say that when other people are around, I'm somehow different - just that when no one is around, I feel a little more free. It's a small distinction, but an important one. 

So how did I spent my weekend alone? On Thursday night, I went to the bar with my MFA friends and drank expensive beers (only one person to pay for!); on Friday I worked at the wine store, then had vegan mac and cheese for dinner and watched the season premiere of Glee while sharing a bowl of popcorn with the pups (all things Nathan does not like to do); on Saturday I went to kettlebell, did school work, made a wedding craft while drinking a beer in the afternoon (the craft did not come out well), and then went to a cookout in my friends' backyard; on Sunday I ran around the lake with Mel, worked at the wine store and got all my grading done, then came home, made a huge pineapple stir-fry, and proceeded to drink three glass of wine while making a PowerPoint presentation for class today.

Not exactly an earth-shattering few days. Not quite a crazy, bachlorette weekend. Nothing too out of the ordinary - if Nathan had been here, it probably would have been just about the same, minus Glee. But if felt good to be alone in my own space, to have the room to stretch out and just be, without taking anyone else's needs or wants into consideration. After four weeks of Doing for Others - traveling for a friend's bridal shower, preparing for my students' classes, completing work assigned by my professors - I needed a break, a few days to be selfish. And this weekend provided exactly that. 

And now I'm ready for Nathan to come home, because when I'm tired of my own company, he's the first person I want to see.